Book Information
-
This podiobook is in progress
Dunkin the Vampire Slayer TWO by Greg Crites
Humor
ADULT: Adult oriented themes, language and situations. Content not suitable for minors.
Click the arrow below to listen to the first episode of this free audio book:
DUNKIN THE VAMPIRE SLAYER II
Death Rides A Pale, Pink, Porcine Horse
The second installment in the trilogy!
In Dunkin One you followed the heroes as they pursue a High Council vampire all the way to Brazil and up the Amazon in search of ancient scrolls that may contain a cure.
Now, in Dunkin Two, from the Smoky mountains of America, to Nepal, France, Australia, Italy, these three are on a quest that spans the globe. A quest to rid the earth of the bloodsuckers and find a cure for that nasty vampire blood.
Many things stand in their way, high council vampires, hit men, ninjas, ancient prophecies, and an unspeakable horror unleashed on the world by desperate vampires. And worst of all, Devlin’s having serious anger issues as he comes to grips with being more powerful and more of a jackass than anything on earth.
...oh, and more jokes, one-liners, and wiseass comments than should be allowed in any single novel.
This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works- 3.0 United States License.
Audio Quality: 
Out of 14 ratings
Narration Quality:
Out of 14 ratings
Writing Quality:
Out of 14 ratings
Overall Rating:
Out of 14 ratings
By: Greg Crites
I'm drinkin' JD right now. It helps unlimber the pinky finger when typing more long strings of offensive words in the active creation of additional novelistic nonsense. Thank's JD! Tell all yer pals. I'm goin' global...when I sober up. DEVLIN II...HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT!!! PAY CLOSE ATTENTION!!! ...haven't started recording it. HAR! Tricked ya. It's pranks like that that illustrate my deep and abiding affection for all the fans. The HackBy: JD of the Dirty South
This series is definitely in my top 5! I told all of my geek friends about it - they luv it too! I am hooked - will be needn my fix pretty soonBy: Greg
Hey, no complainin' to The Hack. I posted several episodes last Wednesday and they apparently became entwined with other files due to some cyberian digital hiccup. Anyway, it ain't my fault; they should release soon. So none a yer whining unless ya want to buy me a beer or bow-up for some recreational mayhem. CYA! The Hack
Chapters
| Title | Description | Date Created |
| Episode 01 (15.27 MB) | Chapter 1 .............. Dunkin II: Death Rides a Pale, Pink, Porcine Horse —The action takes place after the end of Dunkin 1. Devlin is still missing, Dunkin is under attack! | Aug 27, 2008 |
| Episode 02 (13.79 MB) | Chapter 2 .............. Conflict Resolution 101—Ash is in bad shape. Devlin makes a decision, and things get worse! | Aug 27, 2008 |
| Episode 03 (19.43 MB) | Chapter 3 .............. The claws that bite, the glue that binds—The gang split up. Devlin is on the scent and Dunkin is stuck. | Aug 27, 2008 |
| Episode 04 (14.72 MB) | Chapter 4 .............. A Tangled Web of Spooks and Kooks—Devlin is on the trail of the perpetrators and he's struggling with inner monster. | Aug 27, 2008 |
| Episode 05 (12.74 MB) | Chapter 5 .............. Break Stuff—Devlin's went off the deep end. He's on a rammstein rampage! | Aug 27, 2008 |
| Episode 06 (14.53 MB) | Chapter 6 ........ I’ve been down so bleep bleep low—Devlin is still on a rampage as he searches for Dunkin in the underground paranormal facility. | Sep 2, 2008 |
| Episode 07 (14.95 MB) | Chapter 7 ......... Do, Do, Do, That It Looks Like Up To Me.-Devlin either kills or rescues lots of things. | Sep 7, 2008 |
| Episode 08 (9.43 MB) | Chapter 8 .............. Take me to your leader—Devlin calms a bit and tries education coupled with negative reinforcement. | Sep 13, 2008 |
| Episode 09 (14.7 MB) | Chapter 9 .............. Disharmonic Convergence—Dunkin, Ash, and Devlin all make their way for a rendezvous. Mortimer goes under Nigel's knife. | Sep 13, 2008 |
| Episode 10 (15.57 MB) | Chapter 10 ............ My Way or the Die Way—Devlin forges a friendship with the CIA that will prove invaluable to the trio's efforts to battle the scourge. | Sep 18, 2008 |
| Episode 11 (14.51 MB) | Chapter 11 ............ The Touchless Mind Wash—Har! It's Devlin as Mr. Smooth in his first sex scene. | Sep 18, 2008 |
| Episode 12 (11.19 MB) | Chapter 12 — Crisco Cross Dressing — Where Devlin once again makes an ass of himself. | Sep 28, 2008 |
| Episode 13 (13.61 MB) | Chapter 13—A Long Way To Travel Just To Kill Vampires—Devlin's in AUstralia, and utilizing his extensive strategery skils. | Sep 28, 2008 |
| Episode 14 (11.3 MB) | Chapter 14 ............ There’s A Lot To Be Said For Planning — Devlin realizes, too late, that he's about to get his ass kicked...again. | Oct 3, 2008 |
| Episode 15 (11.29 MB) | Chapter 15 ............ Ouch! That’s Gonna Leave A Mark —Har! See previous chapter's description. | Oct 3, 2008 |
| Episode 16 (12.9 MB) | Chapter 16 ............ Wankers in Wingtips - Dunkin and Ash fly off in search of Devlin. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 17 (12.73 MB) | Chapter 17 ............ I Got Dem Foot Up Yo Ass Blues - Devlin is in a singing mood. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 18 (10.98 MB) | Chapter 18 ............ Devil With the Red Dress On - Reunion. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 19 (14.35 MB) | Chapter 19 ............ Eat, Drink and Be Scary — Devlin exploits any opportunity for drinking, this time it backfires. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 20 (13.97 MB) | Chapter 20 ............ Special FX On a Limited Budget - Devlin and Dunkin bond. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 21 (10.47 MB) | Chapter 21 ............ Crouching Vampire, Broken Bottle - Devlin and Dunkin are attacked by Ninjas. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 22 (10.28 MB) | Chapter 22 ............ Pre Papal Pickling - On the way to Italy...almost. | Oct 8, 2008 |
| Episode 23 (12.33 MB) | Chapter 23 ......... Devlin, The Ugly American — Devlin in Rome...can things get worse? | Oct 16, 2008 |
| Episode 24 (12.69 MB) | Chapter 24 ............ The Italian Leg Garden - Devlin is abducted by the Mafia | Oct 16, 2008 |
| Episode 25 (11.27 MB) | Chapter 25 ............ Idle Hands do the Devlin’s Work — Devlin gets a new sword. | Oct 25, 2008 |
| Episode 26 (10.35 MB) | Chapter 26 ............ Charity Begins At Home - Devlin needs an extra hand to drink, so he has to give something away. Sword? or Money? | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 27 (15.68 MB) | Chapter 27 ............ Confession Is Good For The Soul - Devlin and Dunkin are reunited. | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 28 (10.2 MB) | Chapter 28 ............ The Abominable, Carping Nomad - Meanwhile, Ash complains his way through Nepal. | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 29 (12.81 MB) | Chapter 29 ............ Sweet Dreams Are Made of This — Ash faces the tribulation. | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 30 (13.22 MB) | Chapter 30 ............ Die, Then Die Some More - Ash faces unimaginable horribleness! | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 31 (11.34 MB) | Chapter 31 ............ Let’s Go For A Spin Around The Dock - Devlin and Dunkin Bond. | Oct 26, 2008 |
| Episode 32 (11.41 MB) | Chapter 32 ............ I Got My Hammer, What Now? | Nov 6, 2008 |
| Episode 33 (11.1 MB) | Chapter 33 ......... I Got the Fever, There Ain’t No Cure | Nov 11, 2008 |
| Episode 34 (11.24 MB) | Chapter 34 ......... Okay, I’ll try one, but just one... | Nov 11, 2008 |
| Episode 35 (15.16 MB) | Chapter 35 ......... How Do You Make the Angels Weep? | Nov 11, 2008 |
| Episode 36 (10.98 MB) | Chapter 36 ............ It’s My Party and I’ll Die If I Want To | Nov 18, 2008 |
| Episode 37 (11.83 MB) | Chapter 37 ........... Oh, the Humanity! | Nov 18, 2008 |