Book Information
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This podiobook is complete
Crusade by Greg Crites
Humor
Click the arrow below to listen to the first episode of this free audio book:
A drug-fueled crusade by two deranged journalists assigned to look into the morass of organized religion. Cornholery, snake handlers, faith healers, serial killers, sarcasm, blasphemy-good, clean, American fun.

This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works- 3.0 United States License.
Audio Quality:
Out of 33 ratings
Narration Quality:
Out of 33 ratings
Writing Quality:
Out of 33 ratings
Overall Rating:
Out of 33 ratings
By: Greg
Roses are red violets are blue ...ahhh, really, who gives a crap about roses. OK, once more: Roses are dead violets extinct keep readin' my crap and yer brain cells will disintegrate. Crimany! This ain't poetry. I like things that rhyme. Hmmm... Poor deluded ednetman not learned his lessenyetman His big ears were first fileted by the hack crites' crap crusade Recklessly he ventured into the Hack's foul blog first he lost his ears now his sphincter's clogged HAR! Gail, I'd write you one, but I'm too lazy today. Writing on Dunkin III. Gotta ride the word wave when it crests. Thanks, all, for your continued support and willingness to absorb my tomfoolery.By: Gail
Admittedly I have several more volumes to go before I have read it all, but this one is the best. My favorite character is Warren's mother, smarter than all the rest combined! Why aren't you guys asking for some personalized poetry? Oh. I guess I answered my own question.By: EdNetman
Wow! What can I say? I read Scott Sigler's twitter where he mentioned this book and had to add it to my mp3 player (Not a stupid iPod). There's no better recommendation than one from your favorite author, and I was NOT disappointed. I have since recommended this feed to all my friends, and a bunch of idiots I don't know! I found the writing style to be sort of a drunk Douglas Adams without the accent crossed with the naration of a bleach swilling band member from The Dead Milkmen. The oddest mixes sometimes make the best stories, and hell you even won over that SpamTard from Nerdweigh! Now I follow you on Twitter an read your blog. I loved the housing market analogy. I hope to one day be insulted by you in the elegant, thesaurus driven, rum fueled, manor in which I have grown to enjoy listening to. Oh, my favorite line from the "poe"diobook was when you were describing the cab drivers country of origin. "Pack-yer-shit-and-leave-astan!"
Chapters
| Title | Description | Date Created |
| Episode 01 (22.88 MB) | Chapter 1 -Gabriel's day starts out badly as his girlfriend kicks him out, he's almost arrested, decides to go to work and is given a horrible assgnment. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 02 (16.35 MB) | Chapter 2 - Assignment Most Foul - Wherein Gabriel is apprised of the nature of his horrible assignment. Chapter 3 - Deliver Me From Evil - Gabriel gets good news. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 03 (19.5 MB) | Chapter 4 - Rage Against the Machine - Gabriel attempts to send a simple email, but the computer Gods are against him.. Chapter 5 - Mark My Words - After five hours of the single life, Gabriel and Carly reunite. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 04 (22.67 MB) | Chapter 6 - Infanity - We meet Warren, and things look rough for Gabriel. Chapter 7 - Unnatural Coupling - Gabriel suffers further abuse. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 05 (24.72 MB) | Chapter 8 - A Total Eclipse of the Corneas--- Gabriel and Warren get thewir heads right before making their first stop. Chapter 9 The Chapel of My Eye--- A bad start to a doomed project. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 06 (23.46 MB) | Chapter 10 - Cross Purposes: One Joke Over the Line-Gabriel makes a business proposition to the priest. Chapter 11 - Designated Whipping Boy - The two hire a designated driver for the journalistic enterprise. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 07 (26.51 MB) | Chapter 12 - A Relaxing Tangent - The gang, tense and uncomfortable, make an unscheduled stop. Chapter 13 - Touched In the Head, Or, A Random Act of Kindness? - Gabriel must decide whether to torture their new driver, or exhibit a smidgeon of decency. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 08 (21.99 MB) | Chapter 14 - On the Road and On the Ropes- Our intrepid journalists make way to coal country. Chapter 15 - West 'By God' Virginia - A sobering arrival for Gabe in WV. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 09 (25.28 MB) | Chapter 16 - Country Roads, Take me Home...Please - Into the lair of the snake handlers. Chapter 17 - Heal, Ya Sissy - Gabriel faces his worst nightmare. | May 28, 2008 |
| Episode 10 (17.82 MB) | Chapter 18 - Yea, Though I Hang... - Uh oh! Things look really bad for Gabe. Chapter 19 - Words, Don't Fail Me Now - And they ain't looking any better. | May 29, 2008 |
| Episode 11 (23.08 MB) | Chapter 20 - One More Joke Over the Line - Gabriel stalls for time using his finest talent. Chapter 21 - Base Treachery - Still hanging and still angry. | Jun 1, 2008 |
| Episode 12 (22.6 MB) | Chapter 22- To Serve and Expectorate - Gabriel must interact with law enforcement. Chapter 23 - Send lawyers, Drugs and Liquor - Things begin to improve even as they deteriorate. | Jun 1, 2008 |
| Episode 13 (21.92 MB) | Chapter 24 - Time To Focus - Gabriel struggles to find some troublemaking wiggle-room for his upcoming FOX News debacle. Chapter 25 - What A Long, Strange Trip - A glimmer of an idea inspired by hallucinogens. | Jun 2, 2008 |
| Episode 14 (26.65 MB) | Chapter 26 - Fifteen Minutes of Lame - Gabriel makes his on-air appearance while hallucinating. Chapter 27 - A Wrench In the Works - Gabriel plants the seeds of mischief with FOX News. But will they grow? | Jun 3, 2008 |
| Episode 15 (22.06 MB) | Chapter 28 - Escape! - Warren, Myles and Gabe go on safari. Chapter 29 - Religion On a Biscuit and a Banjo - Deliverance? | Jun 5, 2008 |
| Episode 16 (26.77 MB) | Chapter 30 - It's All About the Money - Gabe goes for the cash. Chapter 31 - Inspiration on Karaoke Night - Gabe gets an idea of how to solve his healing problem. | Jun 5, 2008 |
| Episode 17 (21.95 MB) | Chapter 32 - American Idolatry - Gabriel attempts to enlist a distracted Warren in his newest scheme. Chapter 33 - With A Little Help From My Friends - Further horrible machinations ensue and some karaoke is perpetrated. | Jun 7, 2008 |
| Episode 18 (1.87 MB) | Chapter 34 - The Lost Evening - Hmmm! Gabe wakes up disoriented. Chapter 35 - Famous Toilets I Have Known - A mass meeting of the motley crew. | Jun 7, 2008 |
| Episode 19 (26.1 MB) | Chapter 36 - No Atheist's in Fox Holes -Gabe locks himself away for a bit of soul searching rationalization; but he can't escape Warren. Chapter 37 - Buying A Stairway To Heaven - The first meeting with Benny The Hunn | Jun 7, 2008 |
| Episode 20 (22.49 MB) | Chapter 38 - No Comment - Gabe comes face-to-face once again with FOX news. Chapter 39 - Notes, Thoughts, Impressions, Rum - Gabe attempts to work on the article before the coming healing. | Jun 9, 2008 |
| Episode 21 (23.3 MB) | Chapter 40 - I'm Going To A Heal-A-Thon - Oh, it's healing time! Chapter 41 - Oh, The Blessed Sugar cane - Things go terribly wrong. | Jun 9, 2008 |
| Episode 22 (26.04 MB) | Chapter 42 - The End | Jun 9, 2008 |


